~ Tugging At My Heartstrings

Not too long ago, Lynsay and I were on the phone and during our conversation, she said to me, “Mom, sometimes I feel like I have 9 kids!” I had to laugh at that and then I reminded her of how her own dance team coach must have felt at one time.

It was an odd feeling on Saturday afternoon watching Lynsay in a totally different role. She went from the dancer who competes to the coach who not only makes her girls tow the line, but encourages them to reach for the stars . My role, however, pretty much stayed the same. I was still the mom, cheering her on from the sidelines. My stomach had the same butterflies, my eyes still got teary when I watched her and my heart was still full of unspeakable pride.

There’s a sense of awe mixed with an overwhelming feeling of love that rises to the surface when you watch your children go through the various stages of their lives. One morning they’re toddlers standing at your feet in their footie pajamas, their little arms outstretched wanting you to pick them up. The next afternoon they’ve graduated from high school and are now going through college, getting full-time jobs and experiencing life while at the same time, somehow managing to have the time of their lives. And just like when they were toddlers, anything they do or say still has the ability to tug at your heartstrings.

You know, not very long ago, someone told KJ that where our children were concerned, moving to California was the absolute worst thing we could ever do. The hurt that I saw on his face when he repeated that to me had that protective instinct kicking in and I wanted to rip that someone a new one.

This past weekend, when I looked at my children, this is what I saw....a son who graduated from college with a degree in Construction Management. He has a full-time job making more money than KJ and I put together when we were his age. He has his own aparment, pays his own bills, has a great group of friends, is pretty well-rounded and is having the time of his life.

I saw my daughter who has not one, but two majors and a minor. After graduation, she’ll go on to grad school to obtain a degree in International Business. She has a part-time job and is also the dance coach at a high school. Her time is spread thin but she also, is pretty well-rounded and still manages to have fun. I saw two kids who laughed and had fun and not once did they indicate that me moving away was in any way detrimental to them.

Don’t get me wrong; my kids aren’t perfect. They’re kids and I’m sure, like most kids, they’ve done things that I don’t know about. But when someone has the balls to make a statement like that, knowing what my kids have accomplished, I tend to get a little pissy.

This weekend I watched my daughter encourage nine teenage girls before they took to the mats to compete in their very first competition. Six teams and her girls took 2nd place.

See what I mean? Awe, pride and love all rolled together tugging at my heartstrings.